


Back Around

by lil_1337



Series: Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas [2]
Category: Peanuts
Genre: Aged up characters, F/M, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Reunions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-03
Updated: 2013-01-03
Packaged: 2017-11-23 14:12:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/623051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lil_1337/pseuds/lil_1337
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Schroeder comes home after being away at school</p>
            </blockquote>





	Back Around

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Mookie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mookie/gifts).
  * Inspired by [Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas](https://archiveofourown.org/works/1157572) by [Mookie](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mookie/pseuds/Mookie). 



> This is dedicated to [](http://mookiegatto.livejournal.com/profile)[**mookiegatto**](http://mookiegatto.livejournal.com/) and [](http://sharona1x2.livejournal.com/profile)[**sharona1x2**](http://sharona1x2.livejournal.com/) for starting me on this path and then encouraging it when I couldn't help but see where it led. The fic itself is inspired by the song 'I know now' by Sugababes. You can find the lyrics [here](http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/sugababes/aboutyounow.html).

The door had a comfortable familiarity despite the new coat of paint. One of the cars in the driveway was the dark green Civic that Linus had rebuilt from the ground up in high school. His beloved blanket had spent the last of its life as a chamois, the only chamois Linus would allow to touch the paint, glass or chrome of his baby. The other one though, it was new and sported a pink and purple flowery car seat in the back. That had pulled Schroeder up short, his fist hovering just short of knocking. Fighting down the panic that was threatening to overwhelm him tried to calm the thoughts running rapid in his brain. What if Linus had moved on and was in a relationship? What if he was a father? They'd never discussed kids, Schroeder didn't even know if that was something Linus wanted. What if, what if?

Taking a physical and mental step back Schroeder took a deep breath and then another. He'd almost convinced himself that this was a bad idea and really he should leave when the door opened. Linus, his Linus, stood watching him, frowning and not saying a word.. He was a little taller and bit broader than the last time Schroeder had seen him, but the boy he had loved had definitely grown into the young man in front of him. A handsome, nicely built, and decidedly angry feast for the senses.

“Hi.” Unable to stop himself Schroeder broke into a grin fighting down the urge to take Linus into his arms and never let him go. “It's good to see you.”

Linus blinked, turning slightly when the door was abruptly yanked the rest of the way open. Behind him Lucy appeared, a scowl marring her features. The pretty girl she once been had grown into a strikingly beautiful woman. Against one shoulder she held a sleeping infant. The little girl, Schroeder assumed she was a girl based on the pink onesie, socks and bow in her hair, shared her hair color with her mother though her rounder face made it easy to pinpoint who her father was. “What are _you_ doing here?” The voice was more mellow, but the tone was pure Lucy.

“I...”

Not waiting or wanting a response Lucy kept talking though she had shifted her attention from Schroeder to her brother. “You're not going to let him in are you? Seriously, Linus, you just stopped moping. Don't be a blockhead.” With a sniff she stepped back and turned on her heel. “I'm going to put Charlotte down for her nap. Make it quick we need to get the room cleaned out before she wakes up.”

Schroeder cringed torn being feeling heartbroken for hurting Linus and thrilled that he hadn't had an easy time moving on either. Unsure where or how to start he opted for the obvious. “Lucy hasn't changed much.”

Linus' frown deepened and he shook his head. “It's just you. You bring it out of her. She's great with Charlotte. All soft words and gentle touches. She never raises her voice with her, ever.”

Blinking slowly Schroeder tried to reconcile the Lucy Van Pelt he knew with the image of a kind and compassionate Madonna. After a minute he felt his brain starting to short circuit from the effort. “Wow, I can't even begin to picture that.”

“Things change. People change.” Linus shrugged, his shoulders shifting the material of his striped t-shirt in a way that made Schroeder want to reach out and smooth it over his frame. “Why _are_ you here, Schroeder?”

“I wanted to see you. I was in town...” He paused not wanting to play down how important this was. “I've missed you, Linus.” His hands fumbled with the strap of the messenger bag he wore tapping out a nervous melody on an imaginary keyboard to calm and center himself.

“You're the one who left.” Linus' words were mild, but there was an undercurrent of bitterness to them.

“I had a scholarship to Julliard! Did you really expect me to turn it down?” Surprise and confused clouded Schroeder's eyes.

“No!” Linus' tone had the sharp bite that Schroeder associated with his sister. “I'm not that selfish. I just didn't think you'd throw us away for it.” His voice softened and Schroeder had to strain to catch the last of his words. “That you would just go off and forget me.”

“Oh, Linus.” Schroeder swallowed hard, breathing around the pain that threatened to overwhelm him. “I know it's been five years, but not a day has gone by that I haven't thought about you. Wondered how you were and what you were doing. I doubled up my class load and went without sleep so that I could finish faster and come home.” The 'to you' hung unspoken in the air, a physical presence between them.

“Why didn't you tell me? I would have gone with you. All I wanted was for us to be together.” Linus rubbed the hem of his shirt between his fingers using it to ground himself. He'd given up the blanket by the end of elementary school, but never outgrew the instinct to find comfort in the feel of a soft material under his finger tips.

“You were a senior in high school, Linus. Your family would never have let you move to New York let alone live with your boyfriend. They wouldn't even let us be in your bedroom with the door closed.”

Linus sighed and scrubbed a hand across his face. Tears pooled in the corners of his eyes, but he fought them back. “I would have waited and joined you when I graduated I would have been eighteen by then. They couldn't have stopped me. We didn't need to break up.” His head snapped up and he wiped angrily at the tears beginning to roll down his cheeks. “Damn it, Schroeder, I loved you.”

“I know that now.” Schroeder dropped his gaze to the toes of his scuffed and worn sneakers. Linus' words warming him even as they bit into his skin opening slow bleeding cuts on his soul. His tears though, they were more than Schroeder could take without breaking. “I thought I was doing the right thing letting you go so you could move on with your life instead of wasting it sitting around waiting for me.”

“What gave you that right? To decide that you knew what was right for me? You're as bad as Lucy when it comes to trying to tell me how to live my life.” The tears were gone, dried in the heat of Linus' anger and frustration.

“I was young and stupid and I thought I was saving you from heartache.”

“Well you didn't. You made it worse because you didn't trust me enough to let me make my own choices.” Linus deflated, the anger having passed as quickly as it had appeared. He chewed nervously on his bottom lip as if was trying to force himself to stop the words from spilling out.

“I know. I'm so sorry, Linus. I would do anything to go back and change things, but I can't. “ Schroeder looked up his eyes meeting Linus' and holding them. “I can't. But if you will let me I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you.”

“Why should I believe you?”

Schroeder took a deep breath, but continued to hold Linus' gaze. “I have an offer to do a series of concerts. It will be eighteen months on the road, but great exposure. Say the word and you can come with me or I'll call my agent now and tell her I quit. I'll get a job here and give up music if that's what you want.”

Linus stood, his mouth opening and closing as his brain tried to process Schroeder's words. “You would quit...for me?” He studied Schroeder's face, looking for any small sign of deception.

“Music comes from the heart and soul. Without you I don't have either. You're the love of my life, Linus. My muse.” Schroeder moved closer, drawn to Linus as a compass needle is to magnetic north. “You're the only music I need in my life.”

Bridging the gap between them Linus pulled Schroeder close and kissed him; hesitantly at first then with growing confidence and need. When they broke apart he laughed softly. “I guess I need to buy a couple of suitcases.”

From somewhere in the vicinity of the kitchen came the sound of Lucy's voice. “Stupid musicians and their stupid blockhead boyfriends.” With Linus warm in his arms and the sense that his life was finally on the right track Schroeder was less than surprised that he could finally hear the undercurrent of affection in her words.


End file.
